Okay – here it is, my big confession: I don’t read the Bible every day!! (I know you must be shocked, because I certainly am.) I should be ashamed of myself.
But now that I’ve made this confession, what do I do next? If I keep saying that I don’t read the Bible to everyone who will hear me, it will be out in the open and I won’t have to pretend anymore. What a relief! Going this route also gives me a great excuse not to change what I have confessed. But it doesn’t satisfy my desire to get closer to God. And I know it’s not the right thing to do.
So how do I start this new habit? Well, at the beginning of 2010 I set out to do this. I started by praying for a yearning to read the Bible. I also set a modest goal of reading one chapter of the New Testament and one Psalm every day. Already I am behind. What else is new? I should be ashamed of myself.
About three years ago, I decided to start exercising regularly for the first time in my life. Let me tell you, it was painful! I had aches in places I didn’t know existed. It was hard to keep going at times. But I had a great coach who talked me through the pain and sweat. She helped me to set small goals, often focusing on just one area at a time. When I wanted to quit, she kept me going. She encouraged me when I fell short and celebrated with me when I saw the results of my hard work. With patience, love and grace she helped me develop the exercise habit.
Reading the Bible is like any worthy goal I set. I start out enthusiastically, and inevitably I mess up. I am ashamed and embarrassed. I think about giving up. But if I listen carefully, I hear a voice of encouragement. I start over. I fall short again, but I pick up where I left off. I start to see results. I praise God for His patience. I keep going. I pray more. I start to miss it when I don’t do it. I forgive myself for not being perfect. I thank God for loving me through the experience of pursuing my goal.
Looking back on the goals I’ve set in my life, I realize that God has constantly been there to guide me via any means He can use, despite my lack of daily Bible reading. What a gift! He must really love me. I can only imagine what wonderful things lay in store for me when I can connect to Him through His word every day. I rejoice that God is with me as I strive to develop my new habit - one chapter, one Psalm at a time.
“My soul is satisfied as with a rich feast, and my mouth praises you with joyful lips when I think of you on my bed, and meditate on you in the watches of the night; for you have been my help, and in the shadow of your wings I sing for joy.” (Psalm 63:5-7 NRSV).
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